May 02, 2011

May,

yet another day closer to the boy's return. i really cant wait anymore! i've got so so so many things to show him - things i've collected and bookmarked over the past three weeks, snapshots of clothes, happy faces, news and videos i subbed, stalkery findings lol, this and that. had been doing my dailies alone for the past three weeks, it's just weird to do everything alone, i mean what's a boyfriend for if you're going to do everything by yourself.. debatable line, but that came from my boy, and yeah that's just how i feel too. now i'm envisioning for many little dates coming along, just fucking deprived of my boy, hehe so excited. got to thank and love all my sweet friends who kept me company while he's away, sweetest bunch of people :) well, i have a new friend for him!! mr hippopopo and it's so cute, i wonder what name will sean give him. last night was fucked up though, felt completely vulnerable. sean had to call me three times in a night, and i just couldnt stop being a bitch. thought i was forgotten and never missed, all sorts of crap. not a good feeling at all, but i figured that was just completely bullshit, im just thinking of ways and other reasons that doesnt make sense at all, to make myself feel sad. i'm all alone!! i hate to feel unwanted though, really. but why did i even feel that way? my boy loves me so much but i'm always doubting him.. or rather, i feel that it's the other way round.. but the night got better, or rather, he managed to turn the night around anyways with his final video for me, yes the last episode of sean's tv. tears kept rolling down my face, yet i couldnt stop smiling after watching the video, he told me about how grateful he is that i'm there for him, and that he missed me. so what the fuck was i thinking about earlier that night? sigh.... thanks for everything, sean. i'd totally understand if you got pissed off w me after all my shit, but you didnt. instead, you chose to stay by me and make sure im alright. you just got so many ways to make me happy again, sucha amazing pie..

did some covers few weeks back, or maybe a month back. i cant really remember but yeah i did it right after getting the album. it's so good - even my boy loves it!! (ok maybe i forced him to since i grabbed his itouch and put some of her tracks in it) wont be going to her concert on may 9th, this is real sad, but i'm real tight on budget since i have some plans coming along for june hehe! unless someone gets me a tix, then it would be a different story.

kinda suck. it's so raw but im still gonna post them up anyways because im shameless like that. yay.


may, let it be a good month.

1 comment:

Uli Chan said...

Push is my fav song from her album :)