July 22, 2013

Fats all over me

i can't stop binge eating. i can't. people who care are all coming to me and telling me about my weight gain, well not weight exactly, they're all fats  - which is pure disgusting. what else can i to say to myself. i'm all to blame. i tried to skip dinner today, and of course it didnt work out for me. i ate even more than i should. in fact, i binged on five bowls of cereal w PB (that's deadly), six oreo cookies, dimsum and crackers, jellies, wings, a huge bowl of noodles, two bowls of desserts, and a plate of fried carrot cake all to myself in a single day? that's it, i just cant do this. whenever i'm at home, i eat and eat and eat, non stop. i'm already fat and i feel myself getting fatter. and then what, i always end up feeling like shit. i am not trying to be annoying but my face is fat, and i'm not fit at all. also, i cant fit into most of my clothes anymore and this is making me really crappy all day. it's impossible for me to lose some weight for krabs, sigh. no more bikini photos for me. (also, im definitely gonna eat till my heart's content in krabs, jeez) i am contradicting myself and i dont even make sense anymore. but one thing for sure - i'm just, extremely fat beyond words.

why cant i do this anymore, fuck. i need to get healthy. i need to. got to start changing up my meal plans when i get back from krabs. i swear to god, i'm gonna lose all that shit after krabs.

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